Reflected on my educational doctoral professional practice program at the University of Hawaii
by Desiree Cremer, Ed.D.
On the first day, the doctoral candidates sat in a circle around a pillar that interfered with the spatial design; somehow, awkwardly, it blended in with the environment. Introductions and sharing went around the room. It was so powerful and intense to listen to the incredible stories from the candidates. It completely overwhelmed me.
When it came time for me to speak, my voice was finding its way through the inner tunnels of my packed emotions, hidden, and suppressed. I felt my body trembling in my introductions, and the quiet inner voice got louder as tears flowed down my cheeks, saying my name proudly. Desiree Cremer from Cape Town, South Africa, my parents sacrificed for me to be here. My goal is to earn my doctoral degree in education because I believe students should have access and equity to the arts. Growing up under apartheid, I never had this opportunity.
This introduction was my release and emancipation in the doctoral program. I found a diverse generational family. An educational family that shares stories celebrates, argue, laugh, disagree, and then move on. The process of our doctoral educational journey I describe as a wave that washes onto the beach and then pulls back and keeps on coming. I rode this wave with my community of practice family. We took all our classes together, worked in groups, shared ideas, and pulled each other along during challenging times. Out of these interactions and collaboration, I developed unexpected relationships beyond the educational doctorate program, moving together from one course to another for three years, bonds you. Power shifts between teachers and principals quickly dissipated as relationships developed out of the shared collaborative experience.
The interdisciplinary nature and diversity are the program’s strengths. It opened safe spaces for emerging leaders and provided a platform for many voices. The support I received within the program gave me the courage to do an autoethnography for my dissertation, revealing, at times painful, yet empowering. Some of the course offerings profoundly affected my practice and gave me the mechanisms to speak evaluatively about a dance education program.
After the Ed.D., I returned to my school to teach dance, back to my job. Everyone around me wanted to know why I was at school. “You have a doctorate, you supposed to be out there,” and the conversation went, “Use that doctorate.” I started questioning myself, am I supposed to leave, get another job? Should the Ed.D. program provide support to their doctorates after graduation? How can they help? Who receives access?
The Ed.D. gave me beautiful moments, such as presenting my dissertation at Oxford Brookes University in England alongside some of my doctoral families. For now, I love what I do, providing access and equity to all who want to experience the movement of dance. During this pandemic, I am working on finding mind and body balance. And along the way, unexpectedly, discovering another voice, the blog.
An unmitigated raw truth of your journey from your beloved Africa to the United States, in Honolulu, Hawaii. The tribute to your family who believed in you made your journey even more meaningful; they loved you enough to give you wings to pursue your gift of dance as a gifted artist. In the doctoral program you flourished amongst colleagues whose goals aligned with you in a leadership roles, where you bonded together in making dreams a reality in education as excellent mentors who strived to design an innovative education program for the 21st century.
The doctoral program has ignited in you and your colleagues a passion for change that is unstoppable and far reaching in education. Bravo!
Mind and body balance is what our students and teachers need during this time of COVID. Excited to see where this takes you.
Powerful images emerge as I read this descriptive piece, a piece that sparks within me inspiriation and energy; Mana, power cultural life essence. Mahalo nui e Dr. Cremer! Excellent!
I read your post where you shared your joy in beginning your doctoral program. I had similar feelings when I started law school. Now I could be empowered to effectively seek justice. I’ve transferred that power to my teaching by giving all kids an equitable opportunity to be college, career, and life ready.
Outstanding! Thank you for all that you do. Your power and energy is infectious!
Wow! This is spectacular! The knowledge and power you hold inspires so many. Can’t wait to see what you do next.
Your words convey both your personal and professional journey with such clarity and passion. I know these are attributes you will share with your students to empower their lives!
Your words convey both your personal and professional journey with such clarity and passion. I know these are attributes you will share with your students to empower their lives!